Preparation Vs. Expectation

My life in the past month or couple has really been building up.  So many aspects of my life are progressing towards the best I feel I can do or get - financially, emotionally, personally, socially.

Normally to think about the closeness of reaching something I've been desiring very much - especially if its for a period of time - can create intense pressure and stress.  And I have definately felt the bite of stress right before a major decision, a stress that has been so much that I don't even make a decision.  What has been different this time about in the month or so, is that I've actively been building the aspects of my life that are seeing such dramatic improvement.  I feel I have some control over my life and feel responsible for what happens, so I don't have as much stress over a possibility of uncontrollable circumnstances.

In how I have been building up my life, I don't think about it.  I work on myself like I am preparing myself.  I don't think too hard on the possibility of outcomes, as to me that is expecting - a conscious action.  In preparing myself for success, its more a subconscious action that I feel brings about my eventual results naturally.

Regarding all the aspects of my life that I have been working on and improving - I see that as diversifying my pressures.  In the past, I have thought that the thought of working on too many things at once would be overwhelming and that I need to focus on just one particular thing - and yes that is true... to a point.  I focus on generally a most important activity for each side of my life, BUT I think about every side of my life.  The reason being that as I work on one thing, I will have stress and pressures... and those stresses can spill over and be relieved by, ah... working on another part of my life as an outlet for the other.  In this way, if one aspect of my life does not work out as I intended, then I have other things to feel good about so I can quickly recover, get up and try again.



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